SEX AND SEXUALITY

Come Together

By Julie Nxadi

Coincidences have become more and more rare in modern-day life. When things happen at the same time or seem to be in sync i.e. coincidentally, more often than not there was a lot of thought, preparation and applied skill involved. Point being; coincidence cannot be relied on. For this particular subject a lot of women had to be spoken to and the following was uncovered: Women are lying to protect men’s feelings and it is ruining the world of sexual satisfaction.

I prefer to shoot from the hip but to write this article I had to do a few interviews, because I simply had to hear it for myself. My interviews consisted of two questions: “Do you fake orgasms?” and “Why?”

It seems that the general consensus was that the maintenance of a healthy relationship would always require some form of self-sacrifice. However if men are sacrificing their sanity and women their orgasms; the world is in trouble because a women scorned has nothing on a woman sexually frustrated. So again we are led to the question: WHY?

WHY IT IS THE WOMAN’S FAULT?

If a man does not know there’s a problem he has no reason to break out his tool box and start fixing anything. The general response to this by females is that “there is no problem per say…just because I don’t orgasm every time I have sex, doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy it.” However there is a large difference between not having an orgasm every time one has sex and not having an orgasm ever, and after much probing (no pun intended), many women went on to admit that they had in fact never had an orgasm to begin with, or at least not at the hands of anyone other than themselves (this gem of information goes down as clue number one). They all expressed that there is never a right time to reveal that they are not anywhere near climaxing and to spare his feelings they just start screaming at the top of their lungs when they have had enough.

His feelings are of the utmost importance when the lights are off and the two parties involved are all alone locked in a naked sweaty embrace…he is vulnerable and care must be taken when handling his ego. However he must man up or grow a tougher skin with time because his feelings become less of a priority when Miss-Missy names and shames him over drinks at Capello’s at a table full of women loudly whispering “Either I have a huge Hoo-Ha or he has a tiny Ding-Ding either way all between the two of us we managed to make nothing but noise.”

So we can fault the women, we can point out that their inability to be direct and their absolute refusal to take charge is nothing but an injustice to not only themselves but to the sexual revolution as a whole. Ladies can’t continue to pretend that cum chasing is impossible because: SURPRISE! People do it! It happens all the time, I have personally witnessed men and women hand-pick the person that they think most likely to make them hit a high F.

WHY IT IS THE MAN’S FAULT?

REALLY? Come on homies you are honestly going to pretend not to know the difference between a real “Oh my God I think I’m about to…” and a fake one? The options are minimal brother, either you have never had any woman fake an orgasm with you or you have never had a woman actually orgasm with you but to not have the physical sensitivity to be able to tell the difference is a stretch. While the whole “Do you and I’ll do me” theory is all good and well, I often wonder when gents are sitting around having those “I made her cum three times” conversations how these misers contribute? Do they silently sip their drinks, their eyes darting around the room like they’re in a line up?

The horror of the concept of there being twenty-something men who have had countless sexual partners and have failed to bring a single one to orgasm is enough to make one queasy. The excuses stop when one hits 23, thereafter being a human dipstick is frowned upon. By twenty-five it is internationally expected of both men and women (but for some reason especially men *I don’t make the rules*) to have attained at least a little bit of skill when it comes to the art of rogering. So it is true a considerable amount of me need to learn to LISTEN with their bodies in order to hone their skills.

However the blame game aside, clue number one is where the solution lies…namely; one (and by one I do mean women) can almost always count on an orgasm at one’s own hand but with another party? Not so reliable. And though the childish thing to say would be “well that means I’m boss and Party number two is pap” the truth of the matter is; it’s all on whoever aint Cuming to the party!

We all have a personal responsibility to satisfy ourselves and in so doing satisfy others. This may seem contrary to the point previously made, however there is a difference between blindly banging (cum chasing) and satisfying. When one fully satisfies one’s self one unknowingly shares the joy. Though is important that one doesn’t ignore the second party in a sexual situation, it is equally as important to include oneself in the equation. Which is why so many women miss out on the big O.

The very thing that makes women women is the thing that stands between them and that high F. Their nurturing nature causes them to put all the emphasis on the gent who is then blamed when nothing happens.

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